We have a new brother in Christ.  His name is Viktors.

Each day really has gotten better than the one before.  I’d rather it be miserable prior to him leaving.  Then maybe it wouldn’t be so hard to put him on that plane.

I asked how he was feeling about returning to Latvia.  “Mom, whats feelings?”

I used facial expressions to show him different emotions.

“Ahh.  Me sad.”

I was hoping he was going to tell me he was excited.  That would surely make it a little easier to send him back. But he is sad.  I can relate.

Last week I asked if he would like to take a gift back to the director of his orphanage.  He said yes and knew exactly what he wanted to get her.  Earrings.  Diamond earrings.  That wasn’t in the budget but some nice Target earrings were.  He didn’t like the Target earrings, but in 30 seconds he picked out  a set of beautiful bracelets.  I loved watching him shop for his director.  You could tell he knew her well and wanted to please her.  When we got home he looked through my gifts bags and was very selective in which one would work.  It was the one with hearts.  Very girly.

Viktors had the little pouting fest over wanting me to buy sunglasses, which I said no to because he has 2 pairs already.  A wise friend suggested that maybe he was really wanting them for his brother.  So today I said, “Hey would you like to buy your brothers a gift from America.”

He sat straight up in his seat, “Yes!!!”

“What would you like to buy them?”

“Vadim, goggles.”

He hadn’t been pouting because he wanted more sunglasses.  He wanted them for his brother.  So we spent the morning shopping for his brothers and his best friend.  I asked him before we went to the store what he intended to buy.  I really wanted to go in with a plan.  He didn’t hesitate, “Vadim, goggles.  Robert, sweatpants.  Alexsys, soccer ball.”

For as long as I live I will never forget the look of satisfaction on his face over his gift purchases.  The joy it brought that sweet boy to buy treasured gifts for the people who are most important to him was one of the more heartwarming moments we’ve experienced with him.

We spent the afternoon packing.  He has been very anxious about packing.  Each item I put in his suitcase he would tell me a name.  He has planned out who all he is giving his stuff to.  He’s not even planning to keep it all.  So many items he would say their name then say, “They will love it this.”  I love how his English comes out.

Then he took his book light out of his bag and extended his hand towards me, “This one.  You.”

“No, you will love having this in Latvia.  Please keep it.”

“No.  For you.  I love it you.”

Then he took his stuffed tiger out that I gave him.  The one that holds his audio bible player.  “This one you.”

“No way.  I will not keep that.  I bought that for you.  Please take it.”

“No.  Me no Latvia.  You have it.  I love it you.”

When I come home after leaving him at the airport, I do not want to see that tiger.  I will hide it in my closet before he leaves because it will simply make me too sad.

We continued through the evening.  Dinner followed by the boys doing dinner clean up and chores.  I never asked Viktors to do anything.  But he jumped right in with the boys.  He took out the trash, wiped the table, swept the floor and without being asked went upstairs and got ready for bed.

Story time before bed is usually me sitting on the floor with Zachary in my lap for one story and Andrew for another.  Tonight I sat down on the floor, Zachary sat in my lap, and I began to read.  Viktors asked Zachary if he could sit in my lap.  Like only Zachary could do, he hopped right up, and said, “Sure you can!”  And that big 11-year-old boy sat in my lap.  He leaned his body back like a little child and listened to a story he couldn’t understand.  While he listened he traced the veins in my hand like he would do in church.

When the story ended, I wanted to give Zachary an extra story since he gave up lap time.  I picked up his new Jesus Storybook Bible Grandma gave him for Christmas.  Zachary requested I find the story of Jonah, but like always, Viktors wanted his way first and grabbed the Bible.  I whispered to Zachary, “I will read Jonah to you.  I promise.”

Viktors flipped through the Bible and saw the story of the birth of Jesus.  Since he was here for Christmas he has seen a lot of baby Jesus.  Everything he has seen of Jesus has been a baby in a manger.  I wanted him to know Jesus was more than a baby in a manger.  So I flipped a couple of pages forward and showed him Jesus nailed to a cross.  I flipped between the 2 pages.  “That is Jesus.  And that is Jesus.”

He looked at me confused.

“Jesus died on the cross because he loves you.”

Viktors pointed to himself with raised eyebrows. “Me?”

“Yes, you.  He loves you.”

“And you?  And Zachary.  And Jacob.  And everybody?”  he asked.

“Yes.  He loves everybody.  And He wants us to live with Him forever in Heaven.”

He smiled a smile that said he understood what I said.

Using translator, I said, “Jesus lived a perfect life and died for our sins.”  Translator limits the number of characters so I had to break up what I said to him in segments.

He asked, “Why did they kill him?”

In that moment I didn’t know how to respond.  I knew how I would respond if I were speaking to someone who could understand perfect English.  But translator is unreliable and doesn’t let you go too deep in conversations.  So I looked at the boys and asked them how they would answer that question.  They gave very complex and long answers, so I went with my own.  It went something like this.

“Do you know what sin is?”

He looked very confused.  I remembered him using the phrase “shame on you” and being quite surprised that he knew that phrase and proper context. So Jacob and I acted out a skit of Jacob punching me (I’m dealing with boys here…).  I responded “shame on you Jacob”.   I then used the “shame on you” to explain sin.  We followed that up with explaining that Jesus died to take the punishment for our sin so that we wouldn’t have to.  And that because of that when we have a relationship with him, we will get to live with him forever in Heaven.

Viktors never lost interest.  He was hanging on every word.  So I typed, “Do you want me to tell you how to do that?”

“Yes, Mom!” he said.

So I typed that he could place his faith in Jesus and invite him into his heart.  I asked if he wanted to do that.

“Yes!”

“Do you want me to pray for you?”

“Yes, mom!”

So we prayed.  I don’t know how much he understands.  I don’t know if this was a true salvation experience.  Only the Lord knows that.  I will never stop praying for him, I know that.

We were all a bit shocked.  Zachary asked, “So he’s a christian now?”  To which I said, “Yep.”  Later I sat with Jacob and explained that only the Lord knows the heart and level of understanding a person has.  Our job is to keep on praying.  We will not stop praying for his salvation.

Sacrifice: To forfeit one thing for another considered to be of greater value.

What did we sacrifice to host Viktors?  Mainly time.  We forfeited time with our children.  We forfeited time with each other.  But it was for a greater cause.  To show the love of Christ to an orphan.

Having Viktors here has definitely been a sacrifice.

Our hope was that a byproduct of this hosting would be an enlightenment for our children.  That compassion would grow in their hearts.  That they would become less self-centered and more others-centered.  That they would realize how blessed they actually are.  That they would have a desire to serve God and be aware of the needs surrounding them.

I believe the impact in their hearts is much greater than I ever imagined it could be.  I could share so much, but here is just a little glimpse.

Day 22-Our best day to date.  Viktors flowed through the day as if he had always been a member of this family.  He knows our routines, he moves at our pace, things just clicked along.

He received a $20 gift card to Target, so we went shopping.  I loved him having a taste of just how little $20 actually is.  He bounced from aisle to aisle, his excitement uncontainable.  Everything he saw he picked up and threw in the buggy, as if it were his last chance to have access to “things” again.

He didn’t need socks, but socks are important in an orphanage, so he threw in another pack (to go along with the other 6 packs he has received while here).  He threw in a couple of shirts and a wallet.  Putting my body in front of his I held up one of his shirts.  Pointing to the $16.99, I told him that is almost all he had to spend.  “What!”  Hastily, he tossed the shirt aside.  I picked up the socks and the wallet and showed him that those  2 items together were $20.  He tossed them aside.

We moved to the sports section.  He ran to the baseball bats and picked up one that cost $40.  I explained it was twice as much as he had to spend.  He found a t-ball bat for $10 and decided on that for the time being.  Nike is his favorite brand.  He spotted the Nike golf gloves and grabbed the one that said $10.  I showed him that it came with one glove, so to get 2 would take all his $20.  (This was good b/c he has pouted more about me not buying him Nike clothes than anything else since he’s been here). He put it all back and found a basketball for $14 and superhero mask on clearance for $5.

Done.  I was exhausted and we were at Target forever, but he finally got a taste of what it’s like to have only a certain amount of money to spend.  He honestly thinks we have unlimited cash.

The morning was devoted to Viktors.  It was shopping for Viktors.  It was translating for Viktors.  It was explaining and teaching to Viktors.  It was all about Viktors.  And little Andrew just went along for the ride.

Remember back to Christmas we asked my mom to postpone her trip because we were so wiped out?  Well, her box of gifts arrived today while the boys were in school.  Viktors took it upon himself to organize the boxes and wanted to surprise the boys.  He had neat piles set up and when the boys arrived home from school, he met them outside so we could cover their eyes and bring them in to open gifts.

Later in the evening, he wanted to surprise us all for dinner, so he sent us away while he prepared dinner completely on his own.  He even set up the table.  He made his specialty….fried eggs with hot dogs.  The meal was complete with oranges on the side, and the table was set perfectly with napkins and silverware.  He even had assigned seats for us.  The pride on that boys face was priceless.  The moment was taken to heart by my boys.  They were astounded that he could cook and prepare dinner all on his own.  They were impressed that he cooks for himself at his orphanage.  They were saddened that he and his brother taught themselves to cook rather than having a mom teach them.  It was one of the hundreds of moments we’ve had.

Until now he has talked so fondly of Latvia, his friends, his brothers, his life.  As we were enjoying the dinner he prepared for us, I said, “I bet you are excited to go back to Latvia to see your friends.”  He cast his eyes to his plate and muttered, “No.”  After dinner, he was anxious about how all of his stuff would fit in his suitcase.  He wanted me to get him a bigger suitcase.  I explained this is the biggest we could get him according to the rules.  To alleviate his anxiety I packed everything he owned as if he were leaving tonight.  Just to show him it was going to be alright.  That was the time I had allotted for the boys.  It didn’t happen.

Time after time after time, I’ve taken away from the boys in order to give to Viktors.  Because we only have 4 weeks.  If he were here with us for good, it would be so different.  But we have a window of time.  So we are sacrificing.  Minute by minute.

Finally, we get all tucked in.  I thought back to the evening.  From the moment they got home from school until bedtime, I had zero time with my 3 boys.  Yet, none of them were acting out.  They weren’t complaining.  They are still so full of grace towards Viktors.  They inspire me.  Their grace inspires me.

A great day sadly ended in an upset moment with Viktors.  As I tucked him in he asked me to take him shopping to buy sunglasses.  (He has 2 pairs already).  I told him no.  Etc, Etc.  We went through the same stuff we always do.  We can’t buy everything we want.  We have bought him so much.  He should be grateful for what we’ve given.  And on and on.  (But for a child who has nothing, greed is at its ugliest.  We can’t judge until we’ve been there.  This is when grace is most needed).

Again my boys are put on the side as I enter into this dialogue through translation, which takes 5 times as long as it would if we spoke the same language.  But they are listening.

“We love you.  We simply love you.  And we don’t show love by buying you things.  Sunglasses, clothes, toys, none of that stuff makes us happy.  You get it.  It makes you happy for a short time.  Then you want more stuff.  You think it will make you happy.  But it doesn’t.  And you continue chasing what you think makes you happy.  There is only one thing that can bring true joy.”

From across the room, Jacob whispers, “I know the answer to this one.  And by the way, he can’t understand anything you are saying.  But the answer is Jesus.  Only Jesus brings true joy.”

“He can understand, Jacob.  Zachary is anything possible?”

Zachary pipes in, “With God, anything is possible.”

“So if God wants him to understand my words, can it happen?”
“Yes”

Yes, it can.  The impossible is possible with God.

I turned my attention back to Viktors.  He held a glass cross in his hands that I had given him.  It was swinging back and forth.  His attention was on that glass cross.  I reached for the cross and stopped it from swinging as I brought it up to his eyes.  “This is love.  This is joy.”

He turned away from me in his bed.  I turned towards my boys and all 3 were watching the interaction.  I could read Jacob’s mind just from looking into his eyes.  They saw the time I invested this night.  The entire night was given to Viktors.  They understand why.  They know I want Viktors to know Jesus.  They know Viktors has 4 days left.  They know they will have me back soon.  They know he is going back to a life with no parents.

They just witnessed selfishness and greed played out right before their eyes.  And it made them overly grateful.  It was so ugly to see that they didn’t want to see it in their lives.  We all do it.  We all fight selfishness and greed.  It looks different for each of us, but it’s there.  In some form or another.  But an orphan doesn’t use a filter like we do.

And so on this night, a child who has little went to bed upset because he wants more and doesn’t see what can truly fill him.  3 others went to bed who have so much and they became even more grateful for their Savior and their blessed lives.  Their hearts are heavy for this orphan child.

Jacob summed it up tonight when he said, “I’m feeling that twang feeling about Viktors leaving.  You know that twang feeling I’m talking about.  It’s a sharp feeling that is several feelings at once that collide.  Like sadness and madness at once.  I’ve gotten used to him being here and it will be really weird when he’s gone.”

So we sacrificed our time.  But we gained so much more than we ever imagined possible.