The value of both work and play – and why God told me to get back to work

/in , /by

We all love a good vacation, right? A staycation is perfect as well. Basically, anytime we can break from work and enjoy rest is good for the soul.

The boys and I have been on an extended break through the holidays, and I’ve found myself struggling through it a bit. So much so, I felt I was living in a bit of a funk I couldn’t seem to pull out of. It began as a dull feeling, like the winter blues, yet the weather has been lovely so I couldn’t blame it on the weather. I lacked desire and motivation to do anything productive or fun.

On Christmas Day we took the boys to the movies as part of their Christmas gift. They watched Star Wars while I enjoyed Little Women. I shared about this on Instagram so I won’t digress here. The movie inspired me to begin reading this childhood favorite again.

 

I’ve basically existed with my nose in some book or another over my Christmas break. Normally, this is something my soul needs. But in this current state of funk I found myself in, even reading didn’t do the trick. I fell asleep praying for God to give me insight into this foggy feeling and to give me healthy motivation and drive to do the things He’s called me to do.

The following morning I woke and began my quiet time with God. Again I prayed about this lack of desire and motivation. I even wrote out my prayer in my journal. After my quiet time, I still lacked motivation to get after the day, so I opened Little Women and got back to reading while the rest of my family slept. And I met God in the pages of Little Women. He brought me the answer I asked Him to bring.

Mrs. March played a little experiment with the March girls in order to teach them a valuable lesson about the importance of everyone working their fair share. In this little experiment, she leaves for the day, and the girls carry the full load themselves. When they all gathered together again, Mrs. March lovingly shares her words of wisdom with them.

“Work is wholesome, and there is plenty for every one; it keeps us from ennui and mischief; is good for health and spirits, and gives us a sense of power and independence better than money and fashion.”

The girls respond that they’ll “work like bees” and never fuss again over their proper duties. Again Mrs. March offers wise counsel.

“Very good! Then I am quite satisfied with the experiment, and fancy that we shall not have to repeat it; only don’t go to the other extreme, and delve like slaves. Have regular hours for work and play; make each day both useful and pleasant, and prove that you understand the worth of time by employing it well. Then youth will be delightful, old age will bring few regrets, and life become a beautiful success, in spite of poverty.”

I underlined and marked the pages, closed the book, and smiled at God. He truly does meet us wherever we are. He didn’t answer me as I sat quietly reading my Bible and praying. He listened to my plea, then He met me where I went next, in the pages of Little Women.

I looked up the word ennui. It’s French and pronounced ahn-wee. “A feeling of utter weariness and discontent resulting from satiety or lack of interest; boredom.”

Yes, I suffered from ennui! Too much resting, too little purpose to my days, left me feeling restless, discontent, lacking motivation or drive, and downright bored. I needed to get back to work.

Then I paused again. Suddenly I had a wave of compassion wash over me as I thought how many people find themselves in this situation yet never connect the dots of the feeling of discontent and boredom with the state of living with too little work. I’m not saying this is always the case. But if I continued in my too much rest, too little work, my funk would only get deeper. How many people find themselves here without realizing it’s the lack of proper balance that is missing?

Today is supposed to be vacation still, but I knew what my soul needed. It needed purpose-driven work. It needed structure and a plan. And so I did get back to work. The funk lifted, my soul felt lighter, the world looked brighter, and I texted my husband with this message, “I’m back 🙂 ”

 

This is real love

/in , , /by

I posted on Instagram over the weekend this:

“This is always what I envisioned when I wrote and created #seekingchristmas. Though my boys were ages 1-6 at the time, my desire was to have traditions centered around the true meaning of Christmas that they’d never outgrow. To have teens racing through the house seeking Jesus.

Today I saw it come to fruition.

Christmas magic doesn’t leave when they get older, it actually becomes sweeter. Well, maybe slightly more violent and wilder, but I treasure it all up in my heart still.

One of my favorite aspects of Seeking Christmas is its flexibility. It can be spread over 7 days. Or all in one day. Today we did ours as a scavenger hunt, all 7 days at once. We each took turns reading the scripture that tells the Christmas story. For the first time every member of our family could read aloud !! Praise Jesus and vision therapy!!”

After the race to find all 7 ornaments concluded, we lined up the ornaments and took turns reading the scriptures on the back. I typically read from the NIV or HCSB Bibles. But for this Steve’s Bible, which is an NLT version, was nearby. I had the final reading from 1 John 4:9-10.

“God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.”

This is real love.

That line struck me. I wanted to continue revisiting it. I woke thinking of it. This is real love.

It’s what we want. To be known and loved. It’s what we fear. Never finding true love. Losing love. It’s what we want to hold onto. But until we grab onto Jesus, we’ve not tasted real love. And once we have, we know the difference in the love of this world and the love of a Father who sent His son on a death mission.

As we concluded Seeking Christmas as a family, I asked the boys, “Tell me why Jesus was born that Christmas day.”

“To die.”

Blunt. Doesn’t sound warm and Christmasy. Doesn’t sound full of cheer and joy. Doesn’t sound like a Hallmark movie and hot cocoa.

But it’s true. He was born to die. Until we understand that, we fail to see the power and fullness of the Christmas message.

If I had to tie up the entire story of the Bible in one word, that word would be love. From the beginning it was love and til the very end, it’s about love. His great love for us and His call for us to love Him back with our whole hearts. When we love Him, we are able to love others.

Real love.

Sit in those words and let it wash over you. You see, often the people in this world will fail us, they may not love us like we want. We may try and try and never hear the words we want from the people we think we should hear them from. But.

He gives us real love. No one can take it away. We will never lose His love. His love we keep at a distance at times because it’s so pure it frightens us. Run to His love. Let Him lavish it on you. Don’t be afraid. He is our Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, & Prince of Peace. He is good always. His love is faithful. He will never leave us for forsake us.

His love is real.

Merry Christmas.

 

I’m giving myself permission to be unbusy

/in , /by

Get Unbusy

I made a decision, or a choice rather, to be unbusy. Not only to be unbusy, but to be unrushed as well. I can be less rushed when I’m less busy, to be sure. Something had to change. I needed more margin.

I watch our culture wear the busy badge with pride. And for what? To win the most exhausted award?

There are elements to busy we can’t control. But many, and you know it’s true, many we bring on ourselves. I know I do!

I don’t have to say yes to every invite. I don’t have to say yes to every request. I don’t have to fill up the calendar with all the “shoulds”. I am not a victim to the time monster. I don’t have to be slave to the obligations others think I should.

And I certainly don’t have to say yes to every request my children make.

Clear the calendar, leave margin

Part of homeschooling my 10th grader is teaching him how to be responsible for his time. High school for homeschool looks more like college than high school. He works during the day many times. His classes are once a week at various locations. He works independently through the week in preparation. But that means he must use his time wisely. He doesn’t always.

I find myself telling him to look forward first. What do you see in the week ahead? How can you plan now to execute that well? Similar to what I shared in the last post about starting with the ending. I tell him to do now what he can so he has margin for the pop-ups that are unplanned.

In the same way, I want to plan my life in this season to give God margin in my life to pop-up what He will.

I can fill up a calendar with the best of them. I can run until I can run no more. But I’m 43 now. I find I’m craving more simplicity than ever before.

Seasons exist for everything.

The people in front of me are greater than any task on my list. I’m finding that my 40s has brought less pressure than my 30s. I don’t care so much about what people think. I don’t have to be the best at everything I do.

I’ve sensed God drawing me back to my home. He’s been drawing me back into a quietness I can’t fully explain.

He quieted my businesses without much explanation. They didn’t stop, they simply hushed their haste.

Earlier this fall I had a week of extreme anxiety flare-ups. It had been over a year since I struggled with anxiety. My eyes opened to a racing heart. Through the day catching a breath grew more and more difficult. Only someone who struggles with anxiety can understand the physically scary feeling of your chest clamping down.

Much prayer later, it seemed quieter in my soul. Nothing changed in my circumstances, but a deeper peace took a position.

In the weeks that followed I can only say that I began sensing Him calling me to a season of rest. A season of simply being. A season of producing less, achieving less, consuming less.

I feel this call toward home. Simply living and living simply.

It reminds me of the first couple of years after I began staying at home after leaving my full time job. I began discovering the joy of being in my home, making a home, and creating a different kind of life. It was a brand new season and something I’d never had the ability to do before.

Do you ever sense God shifting your season? How does that make you feel? Uncomfortable? Nervous? Excited? A little of every feel?

For me I used to be someone who had to understand it all. I wanted to know all the whys. As I’m aging, I find myself needing less understanding from God. He’s God. He’s the Potter and I’m the clay. He’s careful with His children. When He shifts my seasons or calls me closer to home or to a less busy life, I can trust Him.

These days I’m working hard to keep my calendar mostly open. This is intentional. I’m leaving space for God to fill. I’m leaving space for my soul to breathe. I’m leaving space to say yes to anything God desires to bring my way. In the process I’m trusting in a season of rest. I don’t know what the future holds or what God has for me around the next turn, so when I sense Him inviting me to slowly rest, I say yes, Lord.

 

 

Why starting with the end matters

/in /by

Biting our nails through life

The men in my family are passionate Georgia Bulldog fans. We nearly always have our home open to hosting friends and groups, but not when it comes to Georgia football. The emotions are too intense and raw, the tension can be felt. We’ve been known to lash out at each other in a weak moment of fear. So we choose to keep those moments as mostly family affairs.

Over the weekend, Georgia played Florida. This is a game we want to win. Badly. And we did. The rest of the evening was lovely.

Sunday after church, I grabbed my book and headed to my room to enjoy an afternoon of reading. Steve and Andrew were already on the bed fully engrossed in a football game. I was surprised to see it was the very game we watched with intent focus the night before. They’d recorded it and now watched play by play the entire game all over again.

To me it made no sense. We know how it turns out. We watched every play. Why are we watching this again?

When I asked Andrew about it, he responded, “But now I can watch it relaxed.” Not only was he relaxed, he watched with pure joy and excitement.

Knowing the end of the game changes how we engage with it.

The game itself required pain, sacrifice, and playing beyond limits. It required teamwork and vision. It required sweat and blood. The game was fought for. Knowing the ending, because we’ve seen it before, changed our disposition as we watched it play out.

In our daily lives, what if we focused on the end more than the middle? What if we kept our gaze on Jesus because He already won? What if we played the game of life with joy and rest because we know the battle is already won? How would our day to day change?

Imagine the joy.

Restore the joy of your salvation to me, and sustain me by giving me a willing spirit. Psalm 51:12

How many times have I traveled through an intense season of life with fear and angst only to look back and realize God was with me all along? How many times have I struggled through situations with clenched fists only to look back and see God’s hand all over it?

Lord, give us look-back vision today. Restore to us the joy of your salvation. Keep us focused on You as the victor. You are King of Kings and Lord of Lords. We can rest in You no matter what storms we walk through.

Start with the end in mind.

In many areas of my life, I remind myself to start with the end and work backwards. In parenting, when our kids were babies, we started with the end in mind. We visualized and discussed what types of relationship we wanted to have with our future adult kids. Then we mapped out a plan to live and parent intentionally.

When the parenting days are hard, I often have to go back to that end goal vision, remember the big picture, and release my grip on today.

In our walk with God, it’s quite similar. The days can grind us down, the people can wear us out, but when we keep our focus on the end game, knowing the ultimate ending, we can rest.

We are safe in His hands.

“My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.  I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all ; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.”’ John 10:27-30

One day we will step into eternity with our Lord. All will be well. Today, it is well too. He is here. He is Emmanuel, God with us.

What God Really Promises vs What We Think He Promises

/in , /by

A need for control

Confession: I have a control issue.

I want to know what’s ahead. I want to follow a well-laid plan with diligence. I want to live by checklists and benchmarks.

And quite honestly, I want life to be perfect. Put simply, I want Heaven on Earth.

As I wrote these words, God brought to mind this portion of scripture from Luke 17:21 “For you see, the kingdom of God is among you.” The kingdom is here and now, He is among us. We are called to live by faith.

A life lived by faith is unable to see all the steps ahead aligned just perfectly.

“Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1.

When Fear Threatens My Faith

I live by systems and organization. In predictable areas of life, this serves me well. But in areas that require true faith, I find the more my fear grows, the tighter my cling to my ideals and desires.

Fear creates overreactions. Fear speaks lies. Fear uses language such as “what if”. And fear, at the end of the day, simply leads me down a path of attempting to control outcomes.

This is pointless, useless, and exhausting.

Fear never stops attempting to drive us. We don’t have to allow fear room in our lives. But we must recognize fear when it appears.

If we knew how everything worked out, would faith be required?

See, we don’t know how our futures will unfold. But we have our faith in a sure, steady God who gives us an entire book of promises.

Are we standing on His promises? Or are we holding hands with our fear?

What God does not promise.

  • life will be easy
  • life will be pain free
  • life will be look like IG
  • life won’t be filled with setbacks and heartbreaks
  • life won’t give us more than we have the strength to handle
  • life won’t break us
  • life won’t weary us

What does God actually promise?

  • when life is not easy, He’s holding us up with His righteous right hand.
    • “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10
  • when life is painful, He is our Comforter.
    • “He comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any kind of affliction, through the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” 1 Corinthians 1:4
  • when life isn’t perfect, we wait for the perfection He’s creating for us. It’s not here. It’s in eternity.
    • “And the one sitting on the throne said, “Look, I am making everything new!” And then he said to me, “Write this down, for what I tell you is trustworthy and true.”’ Revelation 21:5
  • when life sets us back or breaks our heart, He supplies fresh mercy every day.

    • “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning;
          great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23
  • when life gives us more than we can handle, He gives us grace to handle it when we need it.
    • “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Cor. 12:19
  • when life breaks us, He heals us.
    • “But He was wounded for our transgressions,
      He was  bruised for our iniquities;
      The chastisement for our peace was upon Him,
      And by His stripes we are healed.” Isaiah 53:5
  • when life wears us out, He restores our souls. He carries our burdens.
    • “He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.” Psalm 23:3
    • “Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.” Psalm 68:19

Listen the the right Source

Don’t listen to the enemy. He tries to tell you God’s not good. God is good always. We live in a fallen, broken world. Jesus told us we’d face many troubles. And He told us to take heart because He overcame the world. Our only job is to remain in Him.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

As you know, I am pretty passionate about keeping God’s Word before us. In a world filled with messages opposed to truth, it takes intention on our part to fix our eyes on Jesus. I’m adding a little at a time to my shop to offer you more ways to fill your home with truth, beauty, and goodness. On your next coffee break, take a moment to step inside and check out what we’ve been working on!

Here’s a tiny peek.

 

When I Need a Spiritual Recharge Do I Remain or Flee?

/in , /by

When I invite God in

I needed a spiritual recharge. I sat at my desk, opened my palms, and prayed. I confess I don’t always do this before I sit to write or work. I asked Him to fill me, direct me, flow through me. I opened my hands in surrender and postured myself to receive from Him while releasing my own tight grip.

When He reveals what’s dead

When I opened my computer, it failed to respond. I clicked harder. No response. I had literally just unplugged it from the charging station. The picture appeared on the screen with the red battery and disconnected charger. I walked upstairs to where it rested charging all night to find the cord hanging from the socket. It appeared connected, but it wasn’t fully. A dead battery resulted.

spiritual recharge

 

I brought my charger downstairs, plugged it in, and removed it immediately. I wanted to test something. Would a few second charge do any good at all? My computer fired right up. The battery showed 4%.

What’s Needed Most

And that is when God showed me a picture of how easy it is to be fooled into thinking we are relying on Him fully, when in reality we often come for a quick charge to receive just enough then off we go.

I plugged my computer into the source and allowed a full charge.

I need Him every second of every day.

Yet I strive away in my own strength, running on a weak battery, failing to see power is freely available to me.

My independent spirit is an affront to God. It’s my pride showing up in the form of self-sufficiency. It’s me receiving from Him the gifts and strengths He’s placed in me and working yet failing to stop and recharge in Him.

I want to learn to live a life that is a constant flow of Him. One in which I truly live every minute aware of Him, turning my eyes toward Him, seeking Him, thanking Him.

The busier life is lived, the greater the struggle this becomes.

The more distractions I allow, the less inclined I am to even hear Him speak.

If I stay in constant motion, I might catch a few whispers but I can guarantee I miss much of what He has to say to me. I’m too busy.

Our busy culture is a great threat to our spiritual growth and development. The danger is we often don’t realize what is happening in our own souls. Our charge is weak, but because we can function, we fail to see the great power we’ve bypassed.

The simple secret

My Thursday night small group gathered. We each take a short passage of scripture and share insights the Lord reveals to us. In John chapter 15 Jesus tells us He is the true vine and that His father is the gardener. He instructs us to remain in Him and He will remain in us and that apart from Him we can bear no fruit.

In the first 10 verses of chapter 15, Jesus says ‘remain in Me’ ‘remain in my love’ or some form of ‘remain’ 7 times. The ESV uses ‘abide in me’.

I believe Jesus wants us to understand this concept. He desires we remain in Him. Not grab a quick charge and dart away. But remain. It’s easier for me to pull away from Him than it is to tuck in tight.

Remain. Abide.

The fight is in remaining.  The temptation is to run to distraction, to busy, to entertainment, to purpose, to anything other than Jesus.

Yet, it’s clear, we are instructed to remain.

Remain is a choice. We can remain or we can flee. When we flee, parts of our soul begin to die.

Maybe it’s time to begin the practice of disconnecting from sources that suck from us and offer nothing in the form of restoration. And let’s simply remain in Him.

Maybe it’s as simple as pausing everything, getting down onto our knees, and humbly approaching God. It’s simply seeking Him and nothing else.

God, we come to you in awe of who you are. You are supreme, you are King. You are Lord. You hold the world in your hands. You knit us together. You know the number of hairs on my head. You know all. Nothing is beyond you. You are full truth, full wisdom. My joy is complete in you.

One way to help us remain

I have to keep God’s Word before me always and everywhere. In this culture and climate, it’s too easy to become distracted and off-course. To fall into the traps the enemy sets for our feet. Sometimes it’s a simple reminder, a word, a phrase, that prompts me to stop and consider Him. To let out a deep breath and exhale my cares of this world and inhale of His Spirit.

I created an Abide tea towel to remind us that apart from Him we can bear no fruit. We can try and end up running ourselves into the ground. Inside we will decay. Yet when we surrender to His love and make the choice to abide, remain, in Him, everything shifts. We blossom and produce what’s impossible on our own. Even when our physical world shakes, we remain strong in Him.

I invite you to browse my shops. Because I’m a one gal shop right now, it takes me some time to update all the platforms. Etsy is updated first, next my shop right here on the blog. Coming soon, you can find me on Amazon Handmade!

 

 

 

One blip of a moment that showed why simple traditions matter

/in , , , /by

In our first year of marriage, Steve played on a church softball team. One crisp Friday night, I sat on the bleachers cheering him on. A group of teenagers surrounded me. They were discussing Friday night plans. We had no children yet, so naturally I leaned in to spy on their conversations.

Lighthearted laughter, bantering back and forth. I smiled. I hope my teens have sweet spirits like this one day, I thought. A girl called out to one of the guys. “Hey, we are all going out to grab something to eat tonight. Want to go with us?”

“Not tonight! It’s Friday. Chicken and rice Friday. I never miss mom’s chicken and rice.”

My heart melted right into those hard as a rock metal bleachers. A teenage boy declining a Friday night out to go home to his mom’s meal. Because that is what Friday nights held in their home.

That was a turning point moment for me as a not-yet-mama.

I saw what I wanted to create in our family. I wanted a connected family. One filled with simple, yet meaningful traditions.

Start with the end in mind.

When an architect draws up a house plan, they ask their client what it is they want. The client will tell them their dream home and what they envision. They may say things like “I want to host large parties. Entertaining is important to me.” And the architect will draw up a plan that includes a design fit for their dreams and ideas.

When building begins, the builder works from the plan. The plan lays out the steps needed to reach the end goal and final result. Each step is intentionally taken to create the vision cast by the client.

In the same way, creating a family culture and establishing connected relationships involves looking down the road and deciding what is most important. Then you make a plan. Not a perfect plan. But. A plan.

With our families, we start with the end in mind too.

 

Here are a few ideas:

  • read aloud together. Start early and keep going when you think they’ve outgrown it. We are never too old to listen to stories. Some of my favorite memories are around books we’ve read together as a family. We’ve laughed and cried and celebrated.  We have a collection of memories around stories. It’s a favorite summer tradition in particular.
  • a simple weekly meal – like chicken and rice Friday. Taco Tuesdays are pretty popular. It’s simply nice to have something to all look forward to together. It’s steady and sure. Taco Tuesday arrives each week without much hurrah. Just a regular meal everyone counts on in a world that often is filled with setbacks and disappointments.
  • family dinners – sitting together to eat is important to me. Creating schedules to make that a priority is hard but worth it. For some families this is exceptionally hard. Try for at least one night a week. Or 2 or 3. Just set what works and stick to it.
  • weekly family night- Pick a night of the week for some family activity. Game night. Movie night. Go get ice cream. Again it’s that repeated activity that everyone counts on and looks forward to.
  • holiday traditions – The simpler the better. You don’t have to consult Pinterest and go over the top. Kids are typically quite pleased with less than we adults realize. It really is about the little things.
  • birthday traditions – My motto is always simple. I have a birthday banner from Zachary’s 5th birthday I saved. I hang it for everyone’s birthday. They all expect to see it when they wake up.

We have so many traditions, but they are super simple. In fact, I’d go so far as to say they are so simple, my kids wouldn’t call them a “tradition”. But to me a tradition is something we repeat together and come to expect we will continue to repeat.

My almost 16 year old son was invited to something recently. When he told me, I quickly said, “Go! You should go.” He responded, “No mom, that night is the same one as our annual tradition. It’s a tradition. I don’t want to miss it.”

And my heart did that melting thing it did some 18-19 years ago as I eavesdropped on teens I didn’t know realizing that I wanted to be a mom who created simple moments and meaningful traditions to foster connected relationships.

Traditions are a reminder of belonging. They connect us one to another.

You may remember I wrote a Christmas devotion titled Seeking Christmas. The heart of the book was to provide families with simple family traditions tied to the true meaning of Christmas. While the book is no longer in circulation, the spirit of Seeking Christmas, along with the ornaments and hide and seek activity, are alive and well.

I created Seeking Christmas to counter the materialism and consumerism of Christmas, while simultaneously creating traditions centered completely around why we even celebrate. My kids rarely remembered a material gift from year to year, but they never forgot the simple moments we built into our holiday season.

It was the experiences and activities they asked for. Not the presents.

So here it is. A 7 day Christmas ornament hide and seek activity. 1 ornament a day you hide, let your kids find it. Then you open the Bible together and read the scripture. Over 7 days you unfold a small part of the Christmas story.

It’s simple. It’s effective. It’s a tradition. It’s for the busiest of busy families. It’s made to stand alone or build upon however you choose. It’s flexible. You don’t have to start on a certain Sunday or December 1st.

You can buy the download to create your own ornaments for $1. I will also be loading some printed, ready to ship ornament sheets on the shop so stay tuned for those. I only have a few sets leftover from my recent Pop-Up shop. So grab them while they are here.