What makes time move so swiftly? Is there any way to slow it down? I’ve yet to find the key. Try as I might, it continues rushing and raging on.
Time wants to steal my moments. So I try to slow the time by being IN the moment. But the moment still whisks by.
I’ve not wasted time. I’ve not rushed through my days. I’ve indulged in the moments. Yet time won’t slow.
I wish time were a swing, moving back and forth.
I didn’t have to wake him for school on this Tuesday. This last Tuesday of 3rd grade. Wait. Is that right? Is he really finishing 3rd grade? Yes, time wants to steal my moments. I dig my heels in harder. His voice pulls me back into the moment. I thought I was there. I wasn’t actually in that moment. I was drifting. Drifting back to the moments of preschool days that seemed long and endless, full of innocence and wonder.
His voice brings me back. “I can’t wait for today to be over.”
“Because then I’m one day closer to the last day of school.”
Wait he can’t do that to me. He can’t rush his time. If his time rushes, then my time rushes. And that’s simply not fair. I need that time with him. I want to stop the clock. He wants to fast forward.
My hand rests on the small of his back. “Don’t do that honey. Don’t rush a single second of your life by. Treasure each day as a gift from God. Remember that you will never have today again.”
That grin. Oh that grin. “I know, Mom. I’m just so excited about summer break.”
I can’t be too hard on him. I was just like him. My mom said I spent most of my childhood worrying away my days. Planning for every possible scenario, nervous about the future. I wanted the time to pass quickly, the faster the better. I couldn’t relish in childhood because I was too focused on the future ahead. What I would do, what I would be, who I would marry, how many kids I would have. I wanted to get there. Quick.
How I wish I hadn’t done that. So many moments I never fully entered because I was somewhere else.
But no more. From the time I was pregnant with our first child, I knew I was done rushing time. I knew I better enjoy every single second I was allowed. I know time is lurking in the shadows, propelling me forward.
Time isn’t really the enemy though. We are our own enemies. Time can’t take from me if I’m completely in the moment. Yes, time passes. But if I enter that moment with my full self, the moment passes, and I’m left with the richness of the experience. The treasure of the memory.
What builds a beautiful life? Is it not a collection of the moments? Each segment of time pieced together to form one meaningful existence? Moments of pure joy and moments of gut wrenching sorrow. Moments. Each one a piece of the puzzle. Piece by piece building the picture God is creating.
I don’t want to miss a moment. I don’t want to rush a single second.
When we enter the next season of life, I can’t imagine the sweet satisfaction that fills the heart when we look back and know we gave it our all. We poured in. We poured out.
Thank you, God, for one more day. One more day to pour in and out. May it bring You glory.