Slow Processor


I watch as one of mine struggles to process information.  His brain receives it, and depending on the time, the day, the circumstances, it processes at different rates.  Early in his development, we noticed a few minor things that caused us to pause.  A disconnect of sorts. Sometimes he grasps concepts, sometimes he doesn’t.  No rhyme or reason can be found.  As he grows, we notice it more.  However, he is tenacious, strong-willed, hard-working, and passionate.  Just what the Lord knew would be needed to overcome a few disconnects.

The mama bear in me emerges at times.  I try to tame her. It’s not the mama bear wanting to protect her child that tries to break out (though she is there as well).  It’s the mama bear that wants to make it all ok.  To soothe, to explain, to make it all better.  I want all connections to exist.  I want everything firing well.  But the Lord planned differently.

This child is passionate about all things sports.  Any sport.  Anything physical.  And he is good.  Seriously, good.  I know we all say this about our littles.  I see certain passions the Lord has placed in him.  And I watch him try to overcome his inability to process information at the rate of other kids by excelling at his strengths.  Where understanding is lacking, brute force shows up.

With his inability to process information as quickly as other children, comes a need to remind him of things.  Not remind him of things he needs to do.  That is the exact opposite.  Simple instructions need be given once.  Get your shoes on.  Check.  Make your bed.  Check.  It’s the things he doesn’t hear over and over again that need reminding until he gets it.

I’m realizing how much I actually have in common with this child of mine.  I need a lot of reminding.  I usually do this through my writing.  I remind myself who goes before me.  I remind myself who I belong to.  I remind myself that I’m forgiven.  I remind myself to fear not.  I remind myself of truths over and over again.  Because I’m a bit slow to process the moments as they come, writing is a necessity for me.  It’s not merely an expression of my heart.

I’m a slow processor at times.  I need constant reminding. Most of what I write comes from a place of remembering something I already know.  I’ve just been slow to process it, and I need to remind myself again.  It’s sort of like a shepherd using his staff on himself.  His crook is intended to guide the herd, but when he turns it on himself, it does the same thing.  My writing might appear to be used to encourage and inspire the path of my readers, but it’s always turned towards me.  I need the gentle reminding of the shepherds hook.

The post I wrote titled A Letter to My Sons (the real reason I say no to electronics) served two purposes for me.  First, to explain my heart to my children.  Second, to remind myself why I say no.  What has taken me by surprise is the popularity of it.   This post has received more views in 2 days than all posts combined over the last 2 months.  I believe the reason is that it has served as a reminder to many of us.  We know the things we feel in our hearts.  Sometimes we just need a gentle reminder to keep us on our paths.

I wanted to thank you for sharing that post.  Thank you for giving me the gift of seeing how the Lord moved in your heart. I truly treasure it as a gift.  I find myself floored by the community of readers we have here.  Thank you for loving me and encouraging me the way you do.

P.S.  It is definitely worth noting that we are not an electronic free household.  We own a computer, 2 iPads, 2 iPhones, Wii, DS, and Leapster.  Oh and tv.  When I wrote the post, I didn’t specify only because it was written as a letter to my boys, who know all of this.  My letter addressed their desires to have electronic usage when we are away from home….doing life with others and each other.  We do use electronics at home.  We give our children limits and guidelines, such as it’s allowed only on weekends, 30 minutes a day over the weekend, etc. Just felt the need to clarify that 🙂